Take this bird and jostle it.
UFC welterweight slugger Matt Brown has declared war on the turkey, denouncing “flightless buzzards” as “bullshit meat”. Instead, MMA veteran “The Immortal” wants families to gather around the dinner table for a nice juicy chest.
“So excited to eat turkey again this year! No one ever said…I’m still advocating making brisket the holiday meat again this year,” Brown wrote on Twitter. ” A steak ! If turkey was a decent meat, we wouldn’t eat it just once a year. It’s only good for fucking deli meats.
Supporters began flooding Brown’s timeline with less traditional turkey recipes, such as frying the bird in peanut oil. While it’s certainly an improvement over the old school “cooking at 350 for 15 minutes per pound,” Brown says it’s still lower quality meat.
“Don’t cook or eat that crap meat,” Brown continued. “I’ll eat Grandma’s ham or I’ll just order some fucking pizza or something. Everything beats Turkey. Anything. The best fried turkey ever is not as good as a fried chicken, nor as good as a mediocre steak. It’s not even subjective, it’s very clear and obvious.
Guess the finicky Brown won’t be having lunch at Liberty Tree Tavern inside Magic Kingdom at Disney World, where they cook roast turkey daily. And that’s before you get to the Turkey Leg Cart in nearby Frontierland.
“Lol so we inject it to change the taste on the inside and fry it to taste great on the outside,” Brown said. “Or I just throw a wick on the grill for ten minutes because it’s actually fucking decent meat. The turkey sucks so much you have to baste the shit on it to eat it. Point proven.
I love the steak, but I’m not sure it goes well with the cornbread stuffing and cranberry sauce.
“Eat it every week then. Oh right they don’t even sell the trash the rest of the year due to lack of demand for the trash,” Brown said. “I’m going to teach Muay Thai in my gym now. Please continue the war on Turkey until real change has been made. Steaksgiving > Thanksgiving. All meat > Turkey. Also, the UFC should have an event on Thanksgiving because MMA > football.
How about MMA fans, willing to trade the pigskin for one hell of a knux?
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